All Your Business Dreams Can Come True

I may be industrious, to a degree. I may be creative. I can count some of my more impressive life achievements as part and parcel of following that mysterious American Dream. I like to think of myself as forward-thinking and capable of extra-box thought. All that being said, I know that the world of business is not my playground. I am an artist, not a suit. I have come to terms with this. I know that there's no MBA waiting at the end of my career tunnel. I am fine with this. But this is no reason for me not to let my brain wander into the realm of free-enterprise. From time to time, I envision new and exciting businesses. Most of them tend to be restaurant-centered as I spend a lot of time eating. Today, in this relatively short post (a welcome relief for some of you), I thought I'd share one of my million dollar ideas. Go ahead and feel free to see if you can follow the little white rabbit of capitolism and see this idea turn into your own little cash cow. All I ask in return is a minor share of the profits....and a free parking space with my own little golden plaque.
Eating out can be fun and adventurous. Oftentimes, going to a restaurant is just as much about the social aspect as it is about the menu. While there are some restrictions to this norm, those who dine out with frequency tend to go to places where they're not just holed up in a dark booth. When you go to a restaurant you want both your stomach and your soul to be sated. You want entertainment options in case your date turns out to be a schmuck or vapid prude. Sports bars are great to watch a game with friends. Pubs are great places to enjoy the company of companions and strangers. Fine dining establishments offer you a bit of flair with the fare to keep you engaged in your meal. Sometimes, though, you might be in the mood for a real adventure. A guessing game. For those occasions when the rest isn't just cutting it, then come on down to my restaurant (concept): BREAKFAST AND EGGS!
Now, you're probably saying "Surely there are enough breakfast-type restaurants out there to not warrant the need for another one." I would have to disagree with you and also ask that you not call me an adverb. My restaurant may have a simple name, but I can assure you that the concept is far from ordinary.

THE MENU
When you arrive and are taken to your seat by a buxom co-ed paying her way through school by herding diners to booths, you will be given a plain white menu. On the inside you will see two items:
Eggs........................................$15.00
Breakfast................................$1.00
That's it. nothing more. Allow me to explain the genius behind this lack of description. For $15 you can have some of the best eggs you've ever eaten in your life. You can have them cooked any way you like (boiled, poached, fried, over-easy, scrambled, in an omelet) and as many as you can eat. These eggs will make you feel as though you've never eaten eggs before. These eggs will remind you of all your favorite childhood memories. These eggs will be little yellow glimpses of heaven.
Breakfast, on the other hand, will be dish that's a mystery. Breakfast might consist of a NY strip steak, or it may be a can of spam. Breakfast could be lobster bisque, or it might be an empty crab shell. You will never know what you're going to get when you order breakfast. And that's where the true beauty lies. I believe that humans love to gamble, and that's what will make this restaurant soar! It's like a dining experience to rival "Let's Make A Deal". You can take the safe bet and order the eggs. While the price might be fairly steep, you can rest assured that you're getting a good-quality meal. Or, you can go the cheap route and see if your culinary gamble pays off. Sure, you might end up with smoked salmon and shrimp Napoleon for an insane price, or you might be paying a dollar to have the head chef come out and give you a list of reasons as to why your mother never really liked you. It's a crapshoot.

THE STAFF
No theme restaurant would be complete without a staff that strictly adheres to the overall vision of the eatery. At "Breakfast and Eggs", our staff will be highly trained in the arts of superb service. The uniforms should reflect those that consumers most want to see in a fine dining establishment: The men will wear expertly tailored tuxedos, white ties, and smartly shined black shoes. The women will wear bikinis.
The waitstaff will encourage patrons to steer away from ordering the breakfast. They will act in the customer's best interest by doing so. They will remind repeat visitors of unsightly breakfasts that have come before, while coaxing new patrons to play it safe and go with the eggs.
"Sir, if you recall your last visit with us, your wife ordered the eggs and was treated to a lovely quiche lorraine, while your breakfast was a pie to the face. I would suggest that the gentleman try the eggs this time."
Part of the fun of coming to a place like "Breakfast and Eggs" will be to see other diners' reactions to the good, the bad, and inedible breakfast orders. Sure, you may see someone feasting on lamb chops with a port wine sauce. There's no guarantee that when you order breakfast that it won't be just a plate of lamb fur smothered in Thunderbird. It's the creativity that keeps them coming back.


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Thanks for reading!