The American dream is predicated on the concept that determination and true grit will eventually allow for success. Those of us who have found ourselves in the deep quagmire of desperation, clinging tightly to that fading glimmer of hope know just how difficult tenacity and consistency can be to maintain. I have to be honest. I was really beginning to feel that this holding pattern of career diversion was becoming more and more permanent. Thanks to some great opportunities that have arisen this week, I can say that, for the first time in a while, I'm beginning to feel like my career may be taking off again. This is an exceptionally exciting feeling. Should things continue down this path, I hope to be sharing some good news with those of you who have been faithfully reading these intermittent posts.
And now, on to the reviews!
51.) BE COOL
The sequal to Get Shorty, is more fun, more outrageous, and even more entertaining than its' predecessor. Chili Palmer (John Travolta oozing in his Scientological best) is still in L.A. He's made headway into the film world, and now he wants to turn his Shylock skills to the music industry and help a young artist (played delightfully and beautifully by Christina Milian) break her contract with a scheming manager. Extra kudos go to Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson and Vince Vaughn for taking on such absurdly over-the-top characters and imbuing them with sheer comic brutality. The Rock plays a body guard of questionable sexuality that would rather croon country songs than bash heads. Vaughn plays a record exec who has co-opted Black Culture so far as to make a serious claim for pretender of the century. If you can overlook Uma Thurman (which is generally considered the best way of dealing with her performances) then you are in for a wonderful treat. Pay extra close attention to the special features which shows the complete, and un-cut music video starring The Rock.
52.) BEFORE THE DEVIL KNOWS YOU'RE DEAD
Sidney Lumet is a phenomenal filmmaker. This convoluted suspense drama is a fine example of his skill and acumen behind the camera. Filled with a fine ensemble cast featuring outstanding performances by Philip Seymour Hoffman, Marisa Tomei, Ethan Hawke, Albert Finney, and Rosemary Harris, this is sure to keep you riveted for the full 117 minutes. Two brothers (Hawke and Hoffman) find themselves in severe financial straights: one sees his alimony and child support bills mounting up, the other has let his drug habit catch up to him. They decide to plan a jewel heist at a Mom and Pop jewelry store. The ironic twist is that the store belongs to their parents (Finney and Harris). When the deal goes horribly wrong, the two sees their plans go spiralling into worse and worse situations. I was genuinely impressed with this film, constantly guessing as to how this would all play out. Very much worth your while.
53.) THE BELIEVER
Prior to watching this movie, I counted American History X as the greatest achievement in films dealing with the concept of tolerance. No more. Ryan Gosling is absolutely brilliant as a Jewish anti-semite. His daily struggle with hiding his identity and past, while pursuing a life in the modern Nazi movement is handled with no self-mockery, and with a genuine unbiased truth. What astounded me more than the story, which was very powerful, was just how smart this movie really was. I remember watching Crash, and having a "well, duh!" reaction to the message of "we should really try to get along". With this movie, the message was just as simple and straight forward, but it never shied away from the true complexities that make us unique and deep human beings. Though I found the ending to be a little too "art-y" for my taste, I was blown away by just how gripping this drama really was.
54.) BEN X
Wow! This Flemish import indie was quite an edgy and powerful piece of cinema. Ben is a teenager dealing with the effects of Autism. The one true joy he has is the online gaming world where he can live out exciting adventures that are a far cry from his tortured existence in high school. He is constantly harassed and abused by bullies, so he eventually can take no more. He is aided by a beautiful girl who recogizes his struggle and the two of them formulate a plan to get revenge for their actions. There are a few scenes that are tough to watch. The bullying and mistreatment that Ben suffers will definitely tug at your heartstrings, but the redemption he acheives by the film's end is quite rewarding. Made in Belgium, the language barrier is broken when you see the hurt and depth in the eyes of an extrordinary actor. Please watch this movie.
55.)BEOWULF & GRENDEL
Well, my good fortune with great movies was bound to be short-lived. Next on the shelf was this waste of a perfectly good piece of plastic. Though it tries to be as accurate to the period as possible (including a cast of actors with Norse names that are impossible to type), it seriously falls short in the execution. The Vikings in the Capitol One commercials seem more authentic than this band of also-rans. Starring Gerard Butler who growls and crunches his way through the sub-standard text. Trying to create a bit of realism (which is certainly what the Old English epic needed), Grendel is characterized as a giant, bearded simpleton, who sleeps with a witch (the odd-cap Sarah Polley) and pummels Hrothgar's men because they killed his father when he was a bearded child. So, basically this is a revenge tale, without bothering to worry itself with those pesky little details like plot, and motivation, and decent storytelling. English students, do not watch this place of doing your required reading.
56.) BESIEGED
Not all that glitters is gold. Not ever Bertolucci film is an epic masterpiece. This snoozer tells the awkward love story of an African fugitive (Thandie Newton) and an eccentric musician (David Thewlis) both eking out a life in Rome. Though the visuals are stunning, the content is...not so much. Thewlis' Mr. Kinsky owns a large Roman villa, inherited from a deceased aunt. He hires medical student Shandurai to clean his house. Eventually (through means that are not made clear) he falls madly in love with her. The rest of the film becomes more of a journal entry than a plot. Shandurai's husband has been imprisoned by the brutal regime that has taken over her homeland. Once again, failing to accurately explain how, he is scheduled to be released and come to his wife in Rome. Spoiler alert!: the ending doesn't make a lick of sense! Billed as an erotic thriller, I found two things wrong with that advertisement.
57.) THE BEVERLY HILLBILLIES
This movie-version of the sitcom is silly, outrageous, and terrible. All that said, it's kind of entertaining. Jim Varney (God rest his denim soul) stars as Jed Clampett alongside Diedrich Bader and Cloris Leachman as Jethro and Granny, respectively. To be perfectly honest, if you can step away from the forced comedy, the stars put on quite a performance that is very enjoyable. Dabney Coleman is in his element as the harried Mr. Drysedale. Lily Tomlin is her constant warm self. The only dry spots in this sea of fun are the appearance of Rob Schneider and Lea Thompson as a scheming couple aiming to con the Clampetts out of their billions. Most of the jokes are fairly predictable, but there are a few golden hums that manage to elicit some genuine belly laughs. Take a chance on this one, and you won't regret it.
58.) BEVERLY HILLS NINJA
The comedy world lost a great talent the day that Chris Farley died. Though his work in Tommy Boy, Black Sheep and cameos in Billy Madison, and Dirty Work are superior examples of his extreme talent, this fun little movie is certainly not an injustice to his memory. Washing ashore in Japan, Farley's character, Haru, is mistaken for the mythic 'Great White Ninja' who is fabled to rise. Trained in the arts of ninjitsu, he never quite grasps the physicality of the methods, though he is well-learned in the spirituality. He gets embroiled in a mission for a beautiful American (Nicollette Sheridan) to uncover a counterfeiting scheme. He teams up with an underused Chris Rock, and the shenanigans are plenteous. Like most of his fish-out-of-water characters, this man-child is blissfully unaware of his own differences. He embraces the world around him like a fresh-faced youth. While not his best work, even Chris Farley's b-material is better than many of today's comics' A+ stuff.
59.) BEYOND THERAPY
The stage version of Christopher Durang's hit comedy is a winner. This dry attempt (fumbled through the fingers of the usually capable Robert Altman) is rather bland an boring. Despite having Julie Haggerty, Jeff Goldblum, and Christopher Guest, the film falls very flat in a most desperate and awkward way. To be perfectly honest, the comedy was virtually non-existent. The performances were ad libbed, and the overall feel was too blah to generate any interest whatsoever. This is quite a shame as the stage play is generally pretty entertaining. Jeff Goldblum's performance is all over the place, Christopher Guest plays effiminate without finding any real nuances. Julie Haggerty is frumpy mess. I think that the best way to deal with this movie is accepting that it is a failed experiment in attempting to blend realism with outrageous comedy. The result is just one long awkward and uncomfortable feeling.
60.) BHAJI ON THE BEACH
They say you should never judge a book by its' cover. You can, however, judge a DVD by its' cover. This little oddity is boxed like an imported bootleg. There are rampant misspellings and grammatical errors galore. What is contained inside is difficult to really describe. Apparently this was made for BBC television in the early 1990's, but it could easily have been an awkward MTV films production. This "life journey" tells the story of a group of Indian women making a daytrip to the beach town of Blackpool. There, each of them faces their own personal challenges that cause them to learn and grow, and accept who they are. While I'm not necessarily versed in traditional Indian culture, I do understand some of the underlying themes of racism, class struggle, and the need to rise above your situation. These are the issues that these women face, and all with the Lifetime Movie feel that makes their struggle more fun when paired with catchy music. If this were chronicling American women, there would be a montage of dancing to Motown music. Instead, these women end up at a male stripper revue. I'm sure it's lost in the translation.
There are many reasons that I find to celebrate the joys of life. Thankfully, SVC will be making her way to town in less than a month. The projects that I am blessed to be a part of seem to be blossoming into fruitful ventures.This is a good thing.
Thursday, April 22, 2010
Friday, April 16, 2010
Heartburn: It's What's For Dinner.
Here I sit in a meat-induced coma, trying to rectify the week that was. Last night was meatloaf night. This means that a meat log weighing roughly the same as George Foreman before he began pressing his burgers was on the menu. Also on the menu: potatoes. Yes, meat and potatoes! There is something beautifully American about dining on this simple and traditional combination. For my meatloaf: a pound of ground sirloin, a pound of ground sausage, garlic, purple onion, parmesan cheese, a litany of spices, and topped with thick-sliced bacon. My roommate drew similarities to the "Bacon Burger Dog" recipe. Though he was right in some ways, I was able to finish this meal with temporarily going blind or experiencing symptoms of ephasia.
It's been 16 hours, and I'm still not hungry. So, I thought I'd update some more reviews. For those of you paying close attention, you'll notice that there are now Amazon.com links next to each film.Should you feel so inspired as to purchase any (or all) of the movies reviewed on this blog, then you will be helping this little writer out.
44.) BARBERSHOP
I think that Ice Cube makes some pretty good choices in films on which he puts his name. With the same tone found in one of my personal favorites, Friday, he exhibits a great blend of hilariously inappropriate comedy mixed with heart and true feeling. Set in a neighborhood Barbershop in Southside Chicago, this "day-in-the-life" tale is both a slice of life, and a commentary on black men in America. What's especially refreshing is that while the movie does fall prey to victimizing some racial stereotypes, it also takes a few opportunities to bridge the gap and make a few powerful statements that must elicit a feeling of pride in anyone who watches this, regardless of skin color. Cedric The Entertainer is brilliantly funny. Hidden beneath some subtle age make-up and a blatantly ridiculous wig, he creates a man who has been in the barber business for a long time, and refuses to see it as anything other than true art. This work ethic is inspiring. Anthony Anderson also turns in rather humerous take as a thief who seems to be having the worst day of his career. I highly recommend spending an evening with this great film!
45.) BAREFOOT IN THE PARK
The questions I had about his movie are the same questions I had when I saw the play several years ago. How in the hell did these two ever get together? And why did they get married in the first place? I suppose the filmmakers can't be blamed for the faults in Neil Simon's script. Robert Redford and Jane Fonda are completely committed to their characters, though the unfortunate thing is that there's not much too be committed to. Both roles are shallow and straightforward. The movie, like the play, doesn't really get interesting until the arrival of Victor Vargas (Charles Boyer). Seeing this couple that had no believable reason to be together struggle to make their ludicrous marriage work is a bit like being broke but making a half-hearted attempt to offer to pay when some one else is reaching for the check. At times, this movie does find ways of producing a smile or two. But, for the most part, it is a good effort at polishing what used to be last night's dinner.
46.) BARELY LEGAL
Why is it that when teenagers are strapped for cash that they opt for the most outlandish scheme to cover their unnecessary expenses? I suppose its a mark of juvenile financial planning that allowed them to find themselves in the given situation in the first place. Take these social pariahs in this teen-age romp from the B-squad of Nation Lampoon. These high school cut-ups decide that they need money. To them, the obvious choice for fast cash is to innure themselves into the porn business. Well, what brilliant thinking! Take an industry about which you know nothing, persuade women to take their clothes off on film (despite that all the girls you know won't even give you the time of day), and market this to consumers (regardless of the fact that you know nothing about marketing or distribution). So this just makes perfect since. Based on the simple premise that says "since we like to watch porn, we are qualified to make porn", these schmucks set out to create their cinematic masterpiece. Of course, not having a budget is not a problem for them either. Billed as both "sexy" and "funny" I found this movie to be lacking the two things that make a sex-comedy really work: attractive women and good jokes. Based on this thinking, I feel that the next time I am in need of some quick cash, I am going to open my own nuclear power plant.
47.) BARTON FINK
This movie proves at last one fallible truth: not all Coen Brothers' films are created equal. Granted, there are some funny and fascinating moments in this study of a man's journey to find inspiration. But, for the most part, this movie lacks the verve and luster of their other films. Applause must be given to the cast for executing some fantastic performances. The attention to detail in creating this WWII Hollywood period piece is impressive, but the looks don't match the content. I really found this film to be dull, despite itself. Even with a murder mystery thrown in, I just felt that it dragged and muddled its' way through too much self-importance. It was a movie that was trying to be a film. While I am an admirer of most of their work, I think I'll file this one away in the category of "Yes, I've seen that, but only once".
48.) BASIC INSTINCT
I'm sure my "man-card" was in great risk of being taken away prior to my finally having taken the opportunity to see this. Of course, I knew the basic story, I knew the infamous interogation scene with the magical leg crossing. I was well-aware that Sharon Stone showed off her assets and her movie-stardom. What I didn't really realize was how good this movie was. Michael Douglas is fantastic as a San Francisco detective with a sordid and checkered past. Paul Verhoeven is truly hit-or-miss with his career. Consider this a homerun. The twists and turns, the pacing of the suspense, the intelligent dialogue all help to create what is a thoroughly enjoyable film that leaves a lasting impression. I think I'll watch this again...and perhaps with SVC the next time she's in town.
49.) THE BASKETBALL DIARIES
At once a cautionary tale of the dangerous road that you can expect to follow if you let drugs and alchohol take over your life, and an exploratory journey into the mind of a young poet who is searching to define himself through the juxtaposition of being both an artist and an athlete. Leonardo DiCaprio shines in what can only be described as a full-frontal assualt of character development. Mark Wahlberg shows some of that depth and intelligence that will manifest itself later in his career. This story of young prep-school basketball players who find themselves swept up in the world of drugs that transforms them from being students with potential, to junkies so desperate for a fix that the unspeakable becomes the standard vocabulary. Powerful, engaging, and just enough off-putting to make this film quite successful in its' aim. I would highly recommend this one to anyone willing to watch.
50.) BEAN: THE MOVIE
Preposterous, yes. Utterly Unbelievable, yes. A waste of a good afternoon, no. Rowan Atkinson returns to his BBC character of the absurdly fumbling Mr. Bean. Inept, and goofy, this grotesquely idiotic klutz is responsible for being the care-taker of the invaluable painting "Whistler's Mother". Sent to accompany the painting to L.A. where it will be displayed at a ritzy museum, Bean is mistakenly represented as a genius art-critic and scholar. Teaming up with the museum curator, one screw-up after another puts this priceless painting in harm's way more often than not. Peter MacNicol plays the curator with bug-eyed abandon. Lots of hair-pulling frantic reactions, and "ay-yi-yi" chutzpah make this silly comedy a respectable entry into the BBC oeuvre. Plus, a cameo by Burt Reynolds is never a bad thing.
Admittedly, this post has taken me nearly a week to finish. Most of my digestive issues have solved themselves, and I am in place to enjoy yet another weekend of culinary greatness. I hope this finds each of you well, as there will be lots more where this came from.
It's been 16 hours, and I'm still not hungry. So, I thought I'd update some more reviews. For those of you paying close attention, you'll notice that there are now Amazon.com links next to each film.Should you feel so inspired as to purchase any (or all) of the movies reviewed on this blog, then you will be helping this little writer out.
44.) BARBERSHOP
I think that Ice Cube makes some pretty good choices in films on which he puts his name. With the same tone found in one of my personal favorites, Friday, he exhibits a great blend of hilariously inappropriate comedy mixed with heart and true feeling. Set in a neighborhood Barbershop in Southside Chicago, this "day-in-the-life" tale is both a slice of life, and a commentary on black men in America. What's especially refreshing is that while the movie does fall prey to victimizing some racial stereotypes, it also takes a few opportunities to bridge the gap and make a few powerful statements that must elicit a feeling of pride in anyone who watches this, regardless of skin color. Cedric The Entertainer is brilliantly funny. Hidden beneath some subtle age make-up and a blatantly ridiculous wig, he creates a man who has been in the barber business for a long time, and refuses to see it as anything other than true art. This work ethic is inspiring. Anthony Anderson also turns in rather humerous take as a thief who seems to be having the worst day of his career. I highly recommend spending an evening with this great film!
45.) BAREFOOT IN THE PARK
The questions I had about his movie are the same questions I had when I saw the play several years ago. How in the hell did these two ever get together? And why did they get married in the first place? I suppose the filmmakers can't be blamed for the faults in Neil Simon's script. Robert Redford and Jane Fonda are completely committed to their characters, though the unfortunate thing is that there's not much too be committed to. Both roles are shallow and straightforward. The movie, like the play, doesn't really get interesting until the arrival of Victor Vargas (Charles Boyer). Seeing this couple that had no believable reason to be together struggle to make their ludicrous marriage work is a bit like being broke but making a half-hearted attempt to offer to pay when some one else is reaching for the check. At times, this movie does find ways of producing a smile or two. But, for the most part, it is a good effort at polishing what used to be last night's dinner.
46.) BARELY LEGAL
Why is it that when teenagers are strapped for cash that they opt for the most outlandish scheme to cover their unnecessary expenses? I suppose its a mark of juvenile financial planning that allowed them to find themselves in the given situation in the first place. Take these social pariahs in this teen-age romp from the B-squad of Nation Lampoon. These high school cut-ups decide that they need money. To them, the obvious choice for fast cash is to innure themselves into the porn business. Well, what brilliant thinking! Take an industry about which you know nothing, persuade women to take their clothes off on film (despite that all the girls you know won't even give you the time of day), and market this to consumers (regardless of the fact that you know nothing about marketing or distribution). So this just makes perfect since. Based on the simple premise that says "since we like to watch porn, we are qualified to make porn", these schmucks set out to create their cinematic masterpiece. Of course, not having a budget is not a problem for them either. Billed as both "sexy" and "funny" I found this movie to be lacking the two things that make a sex-comedy really work: attractive women and good jokes. Based on this thinking, I feel that the next time I am in need of some quick cash, I am going to open my own nuclear power plant.
47.) BARTON FINK
This movie proves at last one fallible truth: not all Coen Brothers' films are created equal. Granted, there are some funny and fascinating moments in this study of a man's journey to find inspiration. But, for the most part, this movie lacks the verve and luster of their other films. Applause must be given to the cast for executing some fantastic performances. The attention to detail in creating this WWII Hollywood period piece is impressive, but the looks don't match the content. I really found this film to be dull, despite itself. Even with a murder mystery thrown in, I just felt that it dragged and muddled its' way through too much self-importance. It was a movie that was trying to be a film. While I am an admirer of most of their work, I think I'll file this one away in the category of "Yes, I've seen that, but only once".
48.) BASIC INSTINCT
I'm sure my "man-card" was in great risk of being taken away prior to my finally having taken the opportunity to see this. Of course, I knew the basic story, I knew the infamous interogation scene with the magical leg crossing. I was well-aware that Sharon Stone showed off her assets and her movie-stardom. What I didn't really realize was how good this movie was. Michael Douglas is fantastic as a San Francisco detective with a sordid and checkered past. Paul Verhoeven is truly hit-or-miss with his career. Consider this a homerun. The twists and turns, the pacing of the suspense, the intelligent dialogue all help to create what is a thoroughly enjoyable film that leaves a lasting impression. I think I'll watch this again...and perhaps with SVC the next time she's in town.
49.) THE BASKETBALL DIARIES
At once a cautionary tale of the dangerous road that you can expect to follow if you let drugs and alchohol take over your life, and an exploratory journey into the mind of a young poet who is searching to define himself through the juxtaposition of being both an artist and an athlete. Leonardo DiCaprio shines in what can only be described as a full-frontal assualt of character development. Mark Wahlberg shows some of that depth and intelligence that will manifest itself later in his career. This story of young prep-school basketball players who find themselves swept up in the world of drugs that transforms them from being students with potential, to junkies so desperate for a fix that the unspeakable becomes the standard vocabulary. Powerful, engaging, and just enough off-putting to make this film quite successful in its' aim. I would highly recommend this one to anyone willing to watch.
50.) BEAN: THE MOVIE
Preposterous, yes. Utterly Unbelievable, yes. A waste of a good afternoon, no. Rowan Atkinson returns to his BBC character of the absurdly fumbling Mr. Bean. Inept, and goofy, this grotesquely idiotic klutz is responsible for being the care-taker of the invaluable painting "Whistler's Mother". Sent to accompany the painting to L.A. where it will be displayed at a ritzy museum, Bean is mistakenly represented as a genius art-critic and scholar. Teaming up with the museum curator, one screw-up after another puts this priceless painting in harm's way more often than not. Peter MacNicol plays the curator with bug-eyed abandon. Lots of hair-pulling frantic reactions, and "ay-yi-yi" chutzpah make this silly comedy a respectable entry into the BBC oeuvre. Plus, a cameo by Burt Reynolds is never a bad thing.
Admittedly, this post has taken me nearly a week to finish. Most of my digestive issues have solved themselves, and I am in place to enjoy yet another weekend of culinary greatness. I hope this finds each of you well, as there will be lots more where this came from.
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Too Much Billy Bob is Never a Good Thing
It's now that wonderful time of year when the harsh bitterness of winter gives way to the warmth and rejuvenation of spring. As these words are being typed young nubile coeds are taking that annual break from class (both in terms of education and etiquette), and the amorous rites of passion that spur us all are beginning to demand more of our time and attention. There's something just beautiful about this time of year. I've always been of the mindset that the calendar year could officially begin when the temps start to rise. That way you really do feel inspired to tackle that resolution list with the energy and verve that comes with a sunny day and a look nature's good side.
I am happy right now. I have many instances in my life that could certainly be cause for serious reconsideration: the terrible economy's impact on my shrinking wallet, the harsh market that seems to be paying less and less attention to art, the mounting bills, the insurmountable tasks that lay ahead. But despite these annoyances, I am finding myself in more and more chipper moods. Maybe it's the joy of a relationship (which is something in which I constantly marvel), or maybe it's just the thrill of being alive, but I feel genuinely happy as I sit down to post today's reviews. Of course there are things that could bring me down, but I am choosing not to focus on what is bitter, but only on what is sweet.
34.) AWAKENINGS
It's really exciting to see Robin Williams tackle something that isn't pure schtick or rapid-fire mania. While as a comedian, he shines, when he chooses to showcase his ability to utilize subtlety and underplay a character is quite impressive. Based on true events, this film follows the meek Dr. Sayer (Williams) as he finds a "miracle cure" for patients who have been catatonic for many years. Through his eyes, we watch bemusedly as these patients begin to see the world around them. The first patient to enjoy this sensation is Leonard (played with power by the ubiquitous Robert De Niro). Leonard had been in this catatonic state since he was a young boy. Watching him awake to experience the joys and beauty of the world is something that moves your spirit. Admittedly, the scene when he is going through the ward introducing himself to all the caregivers who had been nursing him during his sleep brought tears to my cynical eyes. The message here is somewhat overdone, but it is certainly worth stating: Enjoy life! I thoroughly enjoyed this humble and heartwarming film.
35.) DISTRICT B-13
Not sure where this one came from, but I'm glad it was found. This French action flick is clumsily over-dubbed in awkward English, but the dialogue is quickly forgiven when the intricate fight scenes, and explosive chases take center stage. In the not-so-distant future, Paris is divided into sub-districts with number 13 being specifically reserved for the blight of humanity. It is a walled ghetto that is now overrun with crime and the detritus of a community whose own government has chosen to ignore. Fighting to stay alive and on the proper side of morality is a young man named Leito. After being sent to prison (wrongfully) he is forced to team up with uber-cop Damien to retrieve a nuclear bomb that has been lost within the district. The unlikely duo must karate chop their way to success. Overall, this movie is fairly low-budget with some big-budget action sequences. The plot teeters on the side of the absurd, but the physical feats displayed by Leito and Damien are more than enough to make the movie highly enjoyable. Make some popcorn and pop this disc in for a good night of kickass!
36.) THE BABYSITTERS
Perhaps the social statement here is that women forced to empower themselves at too young an age will only bring about their own destruction. Go-getter Shirley (the mousy, yet sexy Katherine Waterson) comes from a modest home, and supplements her income by babysitting for the wealthy yuppies on the other side of the tracks. Through a misguided affair with one of the fathers of her charges, she learns that she can make money offering more than just her sitting services. She soon enlists other girls into her ring of illicit behaviour. While teenage prostitution is not necessarily the makings of a fun film, the taut drama of normal people losing themselves in their own temptations does make for a compelling watch. John Leguizamo and Cynthia Nixon are self-absorbing n both their roles and their perfomances. This is Lolita for modern audiences who want to forgive Humbert and blame Dolores. It is sexy and erotic in places, but that sensuality is frozen over with the realization that it comes from the exploitation of young girls too naive to understand the years of therapy that will accompany their actions.
37.) BACK TO SCHOOL
Who doesn't enjoy Rodney Dangerfield's self-deprecating commentary on society? His bug-eyes have a way of conveying both awe and appreciation for the inconsistencies of the world outside his car window. Here he plays a mega-millionaire (in the throes of his 80's excess) who decides to go to college to share the academic life with his son. The plot is as contrived as most three-camera sitcoms, but there's a heart in Dangerfield's performance that lets you suffer his foolishness gladly. This is standard 80's fare: gratuitious bikini-clad women with too much hairspray and too little common sense, pseudo-rich takes on the neauveau riche, and uninspired criticisms on proto-philosophy. If you can buy that a school rallies behind its' dive team (even having cheerleaders present for the competitions), then you can believe that Mellon (Dangerfield) can afford to have a paper on Kurt Vonnegut written by Kurt Vonnegut (in an all-too short cameo). A nice distraction is a party performance by Oingo Boingo. It's nice to see Danny Elfman cashing checks that have nothing to do with Tim Burton. This movie is funny in a way that your grandfather's jokes are funny: hilarious, but not always worth repeating.
38.) BAD BOYS II
Ok, so I really don't remember if I ever saw the first Bad Boys film, but I will certainly remember this sequel for some time. This movie has everything that I want in a good popcorn flick: beautiful women, big explosions, witty banter, and the chance to see the bad guy get exactly what's coming to him. Will Smith and Martin Lawrence really do work well together. Sure, this has Hollywood spice written all over it, but that cinematic manipulation is forgiven when the product works. Normally, I find Martin Lawrence to be fourth-rate in his comedy, but he really does stretch himself as a straightman for many scenes (even seeming to enjoy being Will Smith's foil). The plot is standard, but the scope is awesome! While this movie will never be remembered for its' artistic contributions, the lasting effect it holds is that it knows exactly when to go BOOM! This one will definitely find its' way back to my DVD player again.
39.) THE BAD NEWS BEARS (1976)
Disclaimer: this would be the perfect children's movie if it were suitable for children! I remember seeing parts on this movie when the requisite Saturday afternoon family programming would include this in the occasional line-up. I came from a family of baseball lovers, so I'm certain someone would pause the channel surfing just long enough to watch a few minutes of terrible infield play, before moving on to something far more entertaining. I'm really glad that I waited until I was an adult to see this movie in all its glory. Walter Matthau is hilarious as the cynical, drunk, washed-out former ball-player-turned-little-league coach. What I most appreciate about his performance is that he never condescends to the kids on his team. He insults them the same way that he would insult anyone else. To me, that's giving these kids the adult-like respect that helps them overcome their own inadequacy. Tatum O'Neal is adorable, and Jackie Earle Haley is bad-ass enough to make yu believe he could be a juvenile threat. Plus, any movie that advocates childhood drinking is just fine by me.
40.) BAD NEWS BEARS (2005)
There are remakes, and there are reimaginings. Remakes are as closely faithful to the original, reimaginings take the basic story and recreate something almost entirely new. This is more like a rerun. I had really high hopes for this one. Afterall, I think Billy Bob Thornton is a great comic talent. Unfortunately, this is not his greatest opportunity to showcase his dark side. Rife with dialogue taken directly from the 1976 classic (see above), most of this film just struggles to play in the same league as its predecessor. Too bad it should just be sent back to the minors. Granted, there are some funny moments. Greg Kinnear is as smarmy as they come, and Billy Bob Thornton ups the drinking ante laid out by Matthau. Pretty much, this film is a swing and a miss.
41.) BAD(DER) SANTA
I think I have found another holiday film to add to my December collection. I remember seeing the trailers for this movie and thinking that it looked funny, but for some reason or another, I'd let this one escape me. I'm glad I finally watched it. Billy Bob Thornton is oozing with repulsive amorality. His boozing buffoonery is showcased brilliantly in this comic gem. Though there are times when the movie dips into the sweet realm, it never goes maudlin. Especially entertaining are the supporting roles played by Bernie Mac and John Ritter (though both do compel a bit of sadness in recognition of the loss of such great talent). I challenge you to watch the scene in the boxing gym and not laugh as loud as you can.
42.) THE BADGE
The third in my Billy Billy Bob Trilogy for the day. This indie features an odd assortment of actors each contributing more to this film than the screenwriters who threw this oddity together. The plot is loose and almost unimportant in most scenes, but Mr. Thornton, Patricia Arquette, Sela Ward and William Devane each provide real distraction by creating some fascinating moments. Seeing Thomas Hayden Church playing a gay-man playing it straight would be a comic masterstroke (if that were the intent). This movie would have made great dark comedy if the producers hadn't been aiming to make a suspense thriller. Set in the bayou, this tale of tranny-hooker gone wrong has all the makings of cinematic badness. Billy Bob Thornton plays a small-town sheriff (taking a page from the Buford T. Justice book of law) who sees his career, life, and understanding of the world coming quickly undone. My advice, watch this movie while eating your favorite cajun dish and enjoying a tasty hurricane as the movie lacks both spice and punch.
43.) BALLISTIC: ECKS Vs. SEVER
Shit sandwich. (see review 31)
The explosions are big, but pointless. The action is extravagant but uninspired. The performances are, well, non-existent. If you watch this movie, be warned that Antonio Baderas and Lucy Liu will make you hate America...and yourself.
The joy of watching movies has yet to ebb. I'm still in good spirits. Life is still meaningful and wonderful. I've chosen to see my life as an impressionist painting. If you get too close, you're only able to see the cracks and imperfections, and everything is too blurry to make sense. But, if you back up, you get a beautful vision of something that is exciting and delightful to see.
I am happy right now. I have many instances in my life that could certainly be cause for serious reconsideration: the terrible economy's impact on my shrinking wallet, the harsh market that seems to be paying less and less attention to art, the mounting bills, the insurmountable tasks that lay ahead. But despite these annoyances, I am finding myself in more and more chipper moods. Maybe it's the joy of a relationship (which is something in which I constantly marvel), or maybe it's just the thrill of being alive, but I feel genuinely happy as I sit down to post today's reviews. Of course there are things that could bring me down, but I am choosing not to focus on what is bitter, but only on what is sweet.
34.) AWAKENINGS
It's really exciting to see Robin Williams tackle something that isn't pure schtick or rapid-fire mania. While as a comedian, he shines, when he chooses to showcase his ability to utilize subtlety and underplay a character is quite impressive. Based on true events, this film follows the meek Dr. Sayer (Williams) as he finds a "miracle cure" for patients who have been catatonic for many years. Through his eyes, we watch bemusedly as these patients begin to see the world around them. The first patient to enjoy this sensation is Leonard (played with power by the ubiquitous Robert De Niro). Leonard had been in this catatonic state since he was a young boy. Watching him awake to experience the joys and beauty of the world is something that moves your spirit. Admittedly, the scene when he is going through the ward introducing himself to all the caregivers who had been nursing him during his sleep brought tears to my cynical eyes. The message here is somewhat overdone, but it is certainly worth stating: Enjoy life! I thoroughly enjoyed this humble and heartwarming film.
35.) DISTRICT B-13
Not sure where this one came from, but I'm glad it was found. This French action flick is clumsily over-dubbed in awkward English, but the dialogue is quickly forgiven when the intricate fight scenes, and explosive chases take center stage. In the not-so-distant future, Paris is divided into sub-districts with number 13 being specifically reserved for the blight of humanity. It is a walled ghetto that is now overrun with crime and the detritus of a community whose own government has chosen to ignore. Fighting to stay alive and on the proper side of morality is a young man named Leito. After being sent to prison (wrongfully) he is forced to team up with uber-cop Damien to retrieve a nuclear bomb that has been lost within the district. The unlikely duo must karate chop their way to success. Overall, this movie is fairly low-budget with some big-budget action sequences. The plot teeters on the side of the absurd, but the physical feats displayed by Leito and Damien are more than enough to make the movie highly enjoyable. Make some popcorn and pop this disc in for a good night of kickass!
36.) THE BABYSITTERS
Perhaps the social statement here is that women forced to empower themselves at too young an age will only bring about their own destruction. Go-getter Shirley (the mousy, yet sexy Katherine Waterson) comes from a modest home, and supplements her income by babysitting for the wealthy yuppies on the other side of the tracks. Through a misguided affair with one of the fathers of her charges, she learns that she can make money offering more than just her sitting services. She soon enlists other girls into her ring of illicit behaviour. While teenage prostitution is not necessarily the makings of a fun film, the taut drama of normal people losing themselves in their own temptations does make for a compelling watch. John Leguizamo and Cynthia Nixon are self-absorbing n both their roles and their perfomances. This is Lolita for modern audiences who want to forgive Humbert and blame Dolores. It is sexy and erotic in places, but that sensuality is frozen over with the realization that it comes from the exploitation of young girls too naive to understand the years of therapy that will accompany their actions.
37.) BACK TO SCHOOL
Who doesn't enjoy Rodney Dangerfield's self-deprecating commentary on society? His bug-eyes have a way of conveying both awe and appreciation for the inconsistencies of the world outside his car window. Here he plays a mega-millionaire (in the throes of his 80's excess) who decides to go to college to share the academic life with his son. The plot is as contrived as most three-camera sitcoms, but there's a heart in Dangerfield's performance that lets you suffer his foolishness gladly. This is standard 80's fare: gratuitious bikini-clad women with too much hairspray and too little common sense, pseudo-rich takes on the neauveau riche, and uninspired criticisms on proto-philosophy. If you can buy that a school rallies behind its' dive team (even having cheerleaders present for the competitions), then you can believe that Mellon (Dangerfield) can afford to have a paper on Kurt Vonnegut written by Kurt Vonnegut (in an all-too short cameo). A nice distraction is a party performance by Oingo Boingo. It's nice to see Danny Elfman cashing checks that have nothing to do with Tim Burton. This movie is funny in a way that your grandfather's jokes are funny: hilarious, but not always worth repeating.
38.) BAD BOYS II
Ok, so I really don't remember if I ever saw the first Bad Boys film, but I will certainly remember this sequel for some time. This movie has everything that I want in a good popcorn flick: beautiful women, big explosions, witty banter, and the chance to see the bad guy get exactly what's coming to him. Will Smith and Martin Lawrence really do work well together. Sure, this has Hollywood spice written all over it, but that cinematic manipulation is forgiven when the product works. Normally, I find Martin Lawrence to be fourth-rate in his comedy, but he really does stretch himself as a straightman for many scenes (even seeming to enjoy being Will Smith's foil). The plot is standard, but the scope is awesome! While this movie will never be remembered for its' artistic contributions, the lasting effect it holds is that it knows exactly when to go BOOM! This one will definitely find its' way back to my DVD player again.
39.) THE BAD NEWS BEARS (1976)
Disclaimer: this would be the perfect children's movie if it were suitable for children! I remember seeing parts on this movie when the requisite Saturday afternoon family programming would include this in the occasional line-up. I came from a family of baseball lovers, so I'm certain someone would pause the channel surfing just long enough to watch a few minutes of terrible infield play, before moving on to something far more entertaining. I'm really glad that I waited until I was an adult to see this movie in all its glory. Walter Matthau is hilarious as the cynical, drunk, washed-out former ball-player-turned-little-league coach. What I most appreciate about his performance is that he never condescends to the kids on his team. He insults them the same way that he would insult anyone else. To me, that's giving these kids the adult-like respect that helps them overcome their own inadequacy. Tatum O'Neal is adorable, and Jackie Earle Haley is bad-ass enough to make yu believe he could be a juvenile threat. Plus, any movie that advocates childhood drinking is just fine by me.
40.) BAD NEWS BEARS (2005)
There are remakes, and there are reimaginings. Remakes are as closely faithful to the original, reimaginings take the basic story and recreate something almost entirely new. This is more like a rerun. I had really high hopes for this one. Afterall, I think Billy Bob Thornton is a great comic talent. Unfortunately, this is not his greatest opportunity to showcase his dark side. Rife with dialogue taken directly from the 1976 classic (see above), most of this film just struggles to play in the same league as its predecessor. Too bad it should just be sent back to the minors. Granted, there are some funny moments. Greg Kinnear is as smarmy as they come, and Billy Bob Thornton ups the drinking ante laid out by Matthau. Pretty much, this film is a swing and a miss.
41.) BAD(DER) SANTA
I think I have found another holiday film to add to my December collection. I remember seeing the trailers for this movie and thinking that it looked funny, but for some reason or another, I'd let this one escape me. I'm glad I finally watched it. Billy Bob Thornton is oozing with repulsive amorality. His boozing buffoonery is showcased brilliantly in this comic gem. Though there are times when the movie dips into the sweet realm, it never goes maudlin. Especially entertaining are the supporting roles played by Bernie Mac and John Ritter (though both do compel a bit of sadness in recognition of the loss of such great talent). I challenge you to watch the scene in the boxing gym and not laugh as loud as you can.
42.) THE BADGE
The third in my Billy Billy Bob Trilogy for the day. This indie features an odd assortment of actors each contributing more to this film than the screenwriters who threw this oddity together. The plot is loose and almost unimportant in most scenes, but Mr. Thornton, Patricia Arquette, Sela Ward and William Devane each provide real distraction by creating some fascinating moments. Seeing Thomas Hayden Church playing a gay-man playing it straight would be a comic masterstroke (if that were the intent). This movie would have made great dark comedy if the producers hadn't been aiming to make a suspense thriller. Set in the bayou, this tale of tranny-hooker gone wrong has all the makings of cinematic badness. Billy Bob Thornton plays a small-town sheriff (taking a page from the Buford T. Justice book of law) who sees his career, life, and understanding of the world coming quickly undone. My advice, watch this movie while eating your favorite cajun dish and enjoying a tasty hurricane as the movie lacks both spice and punch.
43.) BALLISTIC: ECKS Vs. SEVER
Shit sandwich. (see review 31)
The explosions are big, but pointless. The action is extravagant but uninspired. The performances are, well, non-existent. If you watch this movie, be warned that Antonio Baderas and Lucy Liu will make you hate America...and yourself.
The joy of watching movies has yet to ebb. I'm still in good spirits. Life is still meaningful and wonderful. I've chosen to see my life as an impressionist painting. If you get too close, you're only able to see the cracks and imperfections, and everything is too blurry to make sense. But, if you back up, you get a beautful vision of something that is exciting and delightful to see.
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